Williamsburg Hotty – Not a Brownstone

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Great moments in real estate listings – this is not a brownstone, nor is it even a row house. There is an outside chance that the lintels and sills are brownstone, but from the picture I’d put my money on cast iron. Funnier still is that the sign on the building says “Lofts for Rent”. Lofts?, brownstones? – pick a story and stick with it, folks. I’d suggest brick tenement, but that’s just me being honest.

As for the interior, the gut renovation has pretty much sucked the life out of the place, leaving a white box with brick walls (charming!). The countertops might be Caesarstone (and that might be impressive, I honestly don’t know), but from the picture there’s about 1.5 square feet of countertop. I’m not sure what a stone-covered bathroom is, but its fun to contemplate.

Back on the exterior, the shutters are completely out of place (as are the multi-light windows and their fake muntins), but probably not as ridiculous as the air-conditioned shutter on the building to the left. Oh, and to complete the brownstone ambience, there’s a pizzeria downstairs (a long-time favorite, by the way – Tony and Concetto deserve a better broker* than this).

(This broker* seems to specialize in “brownstones” (and using “hot” to describe them) – they have another one listed on Graham Avenue. No exterior shot, but its not a brownstone, trust me. That one has a “new front door” and a “brick pho-fireplace”.)

(*The site seems to be connected to aptsandlofts.com (see comments), but its not actually clear that they are trying to market these apartments.)